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Why do we Resist Healing?

Resistance to healing is when we feel drawn away from experiences that invite us to look within, to be in our feeling body, and to go “through” rather than around challenging emotions.

This resistance can occur subconsciously, or it can be a very conscious “no thank you!!!”

These feelings can hold people back from all kinds of healing experiences, from sitting in meditation, to being honest with your partner about something that’s been weighing on your chest.

The root of this resistance, whether conscious or unconscious, is a belief that “feeling is unsafe.” Of course, we often form these beliefs based on past events that have demonstrated to us in one way or another that our emotions cause us discomfort - and most people believe that discomfort is unsafe.

So where do we go? We “retreat” into our minds and tune out and away from our inner emotional state, leaving ourselves feeling disconnected - not only from ourselves, but also from other human beings.

One of the most powerful mindset shifts that we can experience is the belief that discomfort CAN be safe.

When we associate being in our "feeling body" with


being out of control,

being vulnerable,

experiencing pain, or

regressing rather than moving forward,

we resist it. we avoid it. In fact, we do everything we can to keep ourselves out of our “feeling body” by constantly entertaining the mind to keep ourselves in a “distraction-reaction” state.

Underneath all that, what's really going on? Here are the most common reasons why people resist healing:

  1. They are afraid to face the monsters under the bed

  2. They are traumatized and want to avoid re-experiencing

  3. They believe that they are just fine, OR

  4. They believe that since they have been “healing" their whole lives, they're done - and they want to be free of it.

In these situations - who is in control?

The monsters.

The pain.

The suffering.

When we avoid suffering, the suffering is still in control.

By not embracing our healing, we are out of control of ourselves. One bad thing can happen, and everything will come to the surface. We can fall apart and our lives can completely unravel in an instant. Being empowered means trusting that you have power within yourself. That you can handle anything. It means trusting that you have the strength within yourself to take control of your life. The first step to being empowered is to face your own inner darkness through healing.

Healing is - taking back control

Healing is - finding strength in vulnerability

Healing is - transforming pain into purpose

Healing is - integrating the past so we can create our futures.

Healing is not a destination or a single action to take - it is a commitment to yourself on a soul-deep level to overcome the energy of fear with the energy of love.

Ⓒ Jennifer Helwing Wellness Coaching 2022

I help my clients to create better lives for themselves by changing from within. Even when life doesn’t change, we can - and that is true freedom. If you’d like to find out more about how we can work together, visit to book a session or find out more information. I’d love to work with you!

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